This
is the Order of the traditional Wedding Ceremony including the
legally required elements. In order for a couple to be married, they
must meet certain requirements. When they have met all the
requirements of the State, they are married. Somebody has to examine
and be a witness to the fact that all of the requirements have been
met. That someone is called the official
witness
and is the person who performs the marriage ceremony. When the
official
witness
is satisfied that the couple has met all of the requirements of the
law, (s)he certifies this on the marriage license, which is sent back
to the town clerk's office were the marriage is registered. The
marriage isn't legally sealed just by
the
ceremonial pronouncement of marriage.
Only the signature of an authorized person on the marriage license,
properly and timely filed at the county clerk's office, makes the
marriage official.
The legal requirements that must be met for a
couple to be married consist only of the essentials. So little is
required by State law that there's plenty of opportunity for
religious and personal additions.
Wedding
Party Pictures:
This
should begin at least 90 minutes prior to the start of the wedding
and be finished at least 45 minutes before the ceremony.
Wedding
Party Dressed and Ready:
The wedding party should be dressed,
ready and waiting in the appropriate locations at least 15 minutes
prior to the start of the ceremony.
Prelude:
Any
musical preludes or solos should take place at least 5 minutes prior
to the start of the ceremony.
Lighting
of the Candles:
If the candles or candelabras are lit before
the guests arrive. Other times the ushers light them as part of the
prelude, or as part of the wedding ceremony.
PROCESSION:
Seating
of the Parents:
Having the support and
involvement of parents and grandparents in the ceremony brings a
special blessing to the couple and also expresses honor to the
previous generations of marriage unions.
The
processional music begins with the seating of the honored guests:
Seating
of the Groom's grandmother
Seating
of the Bride's grandmother
Seating
of the Groom's parents
Seating
of the Bride's mother
Bridal
Processional Begins:
Minister
and Groom enter usually from stage right. If the Groomsmen are not
escorting the Bridesmaids down the aisle to the altar, they also
enter together with the Minister and Groom.
Bridesmaids
enter, usually down the center aisle, one at a time. If the
Groomsmen are escorting the Bridesmaids, they enter together.
Maid
or Matron of Honor enters. If she is being escorted by the Best Man,
they enter together.
Flower
Girl and Ring Bearer enter.
Wedding
March Begins:
The Bride and her father enter. Typically the
Bride's mother will stand as a signal for all of the guests to
stand. Sometimes the Minister will announce, "All rise for the
Bride." The march of the bride down the aisle to her
husband-to-be is traditional and symbolic. It is visually striking,
sobering, and sets the tone of the wedding immediately in ways a
thousand words cannot describe.
GREETING:
The wedding should begin by announcing the purpose of the gathering.
Like the procession, the greeting also helps set the tone of the
wedding.
The
Opening Prayer and/or READING(S):If
included.
PRESENTATION
OF THE BRIDE: It's important to many brides that they be given
away. It implies permission on the part of the bride's family to
marry the groom. The bride is presented at this point in the ceremony
to solve a logistical problem, which is to get the person who is
giving her away seated while getting the bride and groom together in
front of the minister.
Song,
Hymn or Solo: At this time the wedding party typically moves to
the stage or platform and the Flower Girl and Ring Bearer are seated
with their parents.
CHARGE
TO THE COUPLE:
The
greeting usually ends with the charge to the couple and those
present. This part is required
by
law. The purpose of the charge is to determine if the couple may
lawfully be married. The statement by the couple that they may
lawfully be married and the lack of any objection from those in
attendance is sufficient to satisfy the official
witness
that
the proposed marriage is lawful.
INTENT:
The
couple is now questioned about their intentions. This, too, is
legally required
.
Two things need to be established to the satisfaction of the official
witness.
First, that both have made their decision to marry the other of their
own free will. Second, that there is a serious life-long intent for
each to love and care for the other.
VOWS:
The
marriage vows are the last legally required
element
of the wedding. The vows are a legally binding verbal contract or
covenant. Each person promises to care for and totally give
themselves to the other, solely and exclusively, regardless of the
circumstances, for as long as they both live. The official
witness
must
be satisfied that the vows clearly and unequivocally state this
regardless of the actual phrasing.
BLESSING
OF THE RINGS: The wedding rings are important symbols. The rings
are prayed over/blessed. This underscores the fact that the rings are
more than just ornaments.
Ring Vows: the person giving
the ring makes a pledge to the person receiving the ring. The wedding
rings serves as a reminder to all - including the wearer - that
someone has pledged their life and love to that person.
PRAYER
AND BLESSING: Now we pray over the couple and ask God to
strengthen their marriage and help them keep the commitment they've
made to each other. The community is encouraged to give the couple
any assistance they need to build and strengthen their marriage, and
there is a stern warning to those who might try to destroy it.
Pronouncement
of Marriage: Pronouncing the couple husband and wife is an
important formality. The statement tells all present that the couple
has presented the official witness with all (s)he need to see, hear,
and know, to determine that they have met all of the requirements of
the law and are, therefore, husband and wife.
The
first kiss of the couple marks the end of the ceremony and the
beginning of a new life together. It's a wonderful tradition.
RECESSIONAL:
The bride and groom
depart.
